Cleric Smacked Down By Woman

October 12, 2012 § Leave a comment

“Oh no, you didn’t.”

A cleric in Iran was badly beaten by a women that he was condemning for being badly beaten.  As it turns out a woman’s ankles are not as offensive as her angry fists.

smack that cleric up

Church Sues Rogue Worshipper

May 30, 2012 § Leave a comment

If you aren’t with us you’re with the Devil

In church news, the Beaverton Grace Bible Church in Oregon is suing a former church member for $500,000 over negative online reviews where the woman called their church a creepy cult.  The church maintains they’re not a cult, they just happen to think child weddings are adorable.

Kids can’t commit

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Jesus Logo No Longer A No Go

May 5, 2012 § Leave a comment

Jesus loves me

A Nova Scotia school board is backing away from banning a student from wearing a T-shirt with the slogan, “Life is Wasted Without Jesus.”  Local pastor Varrick Day is thrilled with the decision saying, ‘It opens the door for children and grandchildren..to stand up to fight for our freedom.”

The student will return to school on Monday wearing the t-shirt, along with another boy who was ridiculed by teachers for his choice of religious boxer shorts.

Jesus really loves me

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Gay Porn Shown in Church

April 30, 2012 § Leave a comment

even Jesus makes mistakes

In Church News, Catholic Priest Martin McVeigh is in trouble after accidentally showing gay porn at a school event with parents and students who were preparing for their first communion. The Priest immediately apologized saying that he meant to show a straight, married couple in a gross anal scene.

you can do my bum on tuesdays.

Gangs Peaceful While Pope is in Town.

April 29, 2012 § Leave a comment

giddy-up pope.

In drug gang news, A warring Mexican Drug Cartel called a temporary cease fire during the Pope’s recent visit to their country. Now that the Pope has left, the Cartel plans to get right back to decapitating their rivals until another guy in a shiny dress shows up.

men in gowns are closer to God.

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